Friday, August 26, 2011

4 Reasons Why Pants Are Overrated

Pants. Biggest overrated piece of clothing I have ever had the stupidity to waste my hard earned cash on. Ok, maybe in winter they are necessary. At least in public.  But do people seriously wear them at all when no one else is around?  Our house seems to have a pants optional policy, but then it is just my boyfriend and I. 

When we first moved out it was pants are banned. In fact most clothes were banned but that is just because when you first move out of home - and I mean really move out, with no housemates - you revert back to being a 3 year old.  We ate cereal at night, when the cutlery ran out we ate with chopsticks and pants were banned.

Pants in themselves are a pain.  I talk to a lot of people who agree that pants are overrated.  Just so you know, I am typing this pantsless.  I must clarify that by pants I mean the trouser/jean things, not nickers (because that would be plain weird). 

1. Pants are the first sign you are getting fat.
I have been trying to ignore the growing size of my rear for a few months now.  It's nothing massive but I am only small and every increase seems to be so much more obvious than on average sized people, at least to me.  For the past few weeks I have been doing my pants-dance to get my favourite jeans on.  I blamed it on the dryer shrinking my clothes. That was until my pants-dance couldn't even get my jeans on past my thighs.  Pants are overrated anyhow.

2. They are just more clothes to iron.
I hate ironing.  It is no secret.  I once accidentally ironed myself on the stomach (please don't ask) and it has been all downhill from there.  I did a pile of ironing today. It is still huge.  Either I forget about ironing my cute summer dresses or I ditch the pants.  Hardly a decision.

3. I always have to get them altered.
Do you have any idea how much it costs to get pants altered? $25 a pair. When I went to America I found these awesome jeans and they came in that short size, you know, for shorties like myself and you know something? They are still 2 inches too bloody long.  Apparently I am shorter than the average short person. Poo on you pants.

4. You only have to take them off again.
Self explanatory really.

4 comments:

  1. Truth, my dear. Pants are for people who aren't man enough to wear skirts, and pants wear out so quickly. I, for one, hate the things and will wear dresses and skirts despite feet of snow outside in the winter.

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  2. I am finally skinny in my fat pants again. for the first time in half a year i love pants. but i agree that pants are not awesome. pajamas are way nicer than pants.

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  3. Sweat pants are where its at... but fuck all other pants.

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  4. Yay! Fellow pants haters! I knew I could count on you guys to back me up!

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